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Dumb As Hell

darkstar600x800.jpgYep, that’s all she wrote. IMO this is the funniest (and pithiest) review I’ve ever gotten. The disgust in her tone is so clear that I laugh every time I see that review. Do I agree with her? Nope, I don’t think I’ve ever written a dumb book. Certainly I’ve written some that were better than others, but to my mind Dark Star is an excellent book, but everyone is entitled to their own opinion.

And yes, I’ve gotten reviews that don’t make me laugh. Reviews that were mean spirited or inaccurate. I’ve even had authors send their flying monkeys after me. Some have pissed me off, and y’all know I can be hot headed, but I learned long ago that it’s unprofessional to respond to a review. Let alone the lengths that crazy woman in The Guardian article went to. I know it’s a common trope that we authors think of these books as our children. (Don’t ask me where that comes from, after all, we don’t sell our children! At least I hope not. To me it ranks right up there with that “I would write for free bullshit. No hell I wouldn’t!) But they are like our children in one way only; once we launch them into the world there’s nothing we can do about how the world receives them. It’s crucial that we as professionals recognize this fact, and, if nothing else, get some friends who will reign you in when the crazy strikes. Because, damn,

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I’m extending my offer indefinitely. Give to Africare and receive a free copy of any book in my backlist. Simply email me the receipt and get your free book. And thank you ever so much.

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And no, this is never a good plan. I am working on the latest Pussycat Death Squad book, Pussycat in Peril. Astaria, whom you might remember from the first Pussycat Death Squad book is in a green card marriage with Kaeden, a Egyptian-American Marine. Kaeden has had feelings for Astaria almost from the beginning, but he doesn’t want her to be with him because she feels beholden, so he’s waiting until she gets citizenship before he speaks up. Then, she returns to her home country to rescue her family and disappears. In the middle of a revolution. A revolution that has cut the entire country off from the rest of the world. And of course, our hero has to go find her. This book is so much fun, especially in light of current events.

The other book I’m working on is Love Me Some Him. This is the long-promised book about Dare from Dark Star. Well, it starts soon after events in the Lion in Russia, so yes, Dare shows up at Tonya and Nate’s wedding with a black eye from being sucker punched by Leo in that story. And well, things go downhill from there. These two have got the Hillbilly Mafia, the Department and at least one prison gang hot on their tail. Chances of survival don’t look good.

Oh, and that big ass gun up there? That’s a British made Lapua Magnum .50 caliber rifle. With a confirmed kill from nearly 3000 yards, it’s favored by snipers everywhere and by Astaria, heroine of Pussycat in Peril and an accomplished sniper in her own right. She’s been known to keep it hidden under her burqa.

Simply Wicked Contest

roslynholcomb:

This is one of my fave books by Lisa. Cassie, the heroine, is utterly charming. Poor Tony doesn’t stand a chance.

Originally posted on Lisa G. Riley.com:

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Simply Wicked comes out on October 1st (ARe, B&N, Smashwords) but is now available for pre-order at amazon.com. Though this is a reissue of a book originally released in 2008, this is a big deal for me because I’ve re-written quite a bit of it. Because I’m so excited about the re-release I’m having a contest befitting such a momentous occasion!

Need to Know:

Simply Wicked comes out October 1st. Pre-orders are available now.

Grand Prize consists of a $100 amazon gift card and a free copy of my e-book, You are Mine valued at $3.99 from my Friends and Lovers Series. One winner will be selected randomly from a group that answers four questions correctly by 5 p.m. CST October 10th.

The second prize consists of a $50 amazon gift card and a free copy of You are Mine valued at $3.99. The single winner…

View original 1,243 more words

Help Me Find This Bookcase

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I love this bookcase like damn and whoa. It’s perfect for Luke’s room. Problem is, I can’t find the darned thing, or even anything similar. His room is really tiny and the bookcase with drawers would be perfect beside his bed. And he really, really needs drawers beside his bed. Otherwise I find Legos and other teeny tiny toys IN his bed. Have you seen anything similar? I don’t care about the color as I can always paint it. Apparently the original is some custom interior design deal that probably cost more than my house. I’ve thought about making them, but I’m not good enough to build drawers, so I need to find something like it. Any ideas?


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I just got a brand spanking new royalty check from Amazon, which I’ve donated to Africare for Ebola relief. I’m challenging all my fellow interracial romance authors to donate as well. Come on ladies, do it for the sisters.

And for those of you who aren’t authors, make a donation to Africare through Gina’s link between now and midnight on October 3rd 2014 and get a FREE copy of any book from my backlist. Simply email me the receipt and tell me which one my books you want and in what format. Now come on, you can’t beat that one with a stick.

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As the primary caregivers during this epidemic women are more likely to be exposed to this disease. Gina McCauley of What About Our Daughters has started a fundraiser with Africare to purchase protective gear for those women. Imma need all y’all to do me a solid and help out our sisters in this time of crisis. Please give what you can, and thanks ever so much.

According to their site, a $25 donation will buy 200 exam gloves, $50 can purchase 5 isolation gowns, $100 purchases a complete set of personal protective equipment including a body suit, goggles, gloves and shoe/boot covers, $250 purchases 10 pairs of rubber boots and $500 purchases 5 cases of face masks and 10 boxes of sterile syringes and needles.

This is a post on Gina’s page directly from Africare explains in detail what an “unrestricted” donation means.

We completely understand that an unrestricted donation can feel, at times, like a bit of a risk for an individual. Currently, all unrestricted money raised is being directed to Ebola. What does that mean? It might mean direct cash contributions to families who have lost loved ones, and thus lost income which sustained an entire family. It might mean paying for gas for our staff in Liberia to deliver personal protective gear to healthcare workers in more remote locations. It might include equiping microphones and sound systems to trucks to blast messages to communities about ebola, educating them on methods of contraction and prevention. It might include working with local organizations to trace individuals who have come in contact with disease. As What About Our Daughters notes, unrestricted money allows our Liberian staff in Liberia to direct the funds to where the need is the greatest. We are audited every year, and 92 cents to every dollar, including unrestricted money, is allocated to projects. Please do check out our ebola page — http://www.africare.org/ebola, but also, our president’s message on how money is allocated http://bit.ly/1aaqpNC The rate has decreased slightly due to the cost of doing business, however, the premise is the same. Please feel free to contact us on twitter with any other questions! @africare

If you want your money to go only to Ebola specific items, please use this link and indicate you heard about it from Gina’s page where indicated.

http://www.africare.org/how-you-can-help/africare-ebola-outbreak-relief/

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I’m an absolute NPR junkie and listen to it constantly. I’m also obsessed with songwriters and their uncanny ability to compose in four minutes a story that would take me thousands of words to write. The other day I was listening to a story about Allee Willis, who co-wrote “September,” one of my all time favorite songs, by the legendary Earth, Wind and Fire. As the writing process went on, she was concerned about Maurice White’s use of the nonsense phrase, “Ba-dee-ya,” and kept asking him when they were going to replace it with real words.

‘What the f- – – does ‘ba-dee-ya’ mean?’ And he essentially said, ‘Who the f- – – cares?'” she says. “I learned my greatest lesson ever in songwriting from him, which was never let the lyric get in the way of the groove.”

I think this is an important lesson for writers in every genre. Years ago when I was working on Let’s Do It Again, I got into a bit of a situation with the editors over the use of the word “slingshot” as a verb. I know slingshot is not typically used as a verb, but in this particular scene where the heroine is flipping mashed potatoes at the hero across the dinner table because he’s kissing up to her mother, the word “slingshot” evokes imagery that the word catapult does not. A slingshot is a child’s toy and I envisioned the heroine as being childish in her aggravation at the hero. Well, after it was pinged for the third time in the edits, I finally told them I was prepared to die on that hill, but slingshot stayed. IMO that is one of my funniest scenes and I’ve gotten more email about it than pretty much any other scene I’ve ever written.

What does ba-dee-ya mean? You can’t use “slingshot” as a verb. Don’t write books with rock star heroes. And the list goes on. There’s always someone who will be bogged down in the minutiae of a story, but never forget that you are the ultimate arbiter of what goes into your books. That doesn’t mean you should throw a hissy fit over the use of basic grammar or reject perfectly reasonable suggestions about continuity and such. But you’re the only person who knows the story. You are the queen of the universe in a world that you’ve created. Never, ever forget that.

This post has nothing to do with Milk & Honey, I just think that cover is delicious.

Try A Little Tenderness Excerpt

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I think i’ve said repeatedly that Try a Little Tenderness is my favorite book. It’s the one book that combines most of my passions, sexy nerd scientist hero and viruses. Lots and lots of virus. In a different world, I would’ve been a scientist, or maybe a history-scientist. I absolutely love history and am fascinated with the impact disease has had on it. Many of the great sociological changes of the 20th century can be directly attributed to disease. Some even speculate that Woodrow Wilson had a mental collapse brought on by the effect of influenza which led to his inability to negotiate at the end of World War I. And, of course, we can all speculate that European expansion and colonialization of the New World wouldn’t have occurred had not disease wiped out 90% of the native population. Right now we are battling ebola and I’m watching closely with some trepidation, because ebola is not particularly “catchy,” yet we’re struggling to contain it. What with climate change we are going to encounter more deadly emerging viruses and our response has got to be more on point. With all that said, when I wrote Try A Little Tenderness six years ago I was hopeful that mankind will overcome as we alway have. I haven’t lost that optimism, but I am concerned. Here is an excerpt from my all time favorite book”

Lola grinned as she heard Koss’s bellow from down the hall. In fact she had no doubt their neighbors on the first floor had heard him as well. She shook her head. He’d been yelling off and on all morning. Why didn’t the man simply get a graduate assistant to help him with his notes? She’d never met anyone who hated to write as much as he did. Lola put down her textbooks to go find out what had set her cantankerous lover off this time.
“What’s going on?” she asked from the doorway of the study. Koss sat as his desk, staring absently into space. “Need some help?”
Koss looked up. “No, no. I’m just trying to get my notes organized.”
Lola walked over to look over his shoulder at the motley assortment of notes that littered his desk. For such a neat freak, he certainly seemed to take his lab notes on whatever scrap of paper he happened to find. Was that a gum wrapper? Damn! She shook her head as she picked up the sticky notes and at least one dry cleaning ticket. Undoubtedly for his one sport coat which he hadn’t been able to locate for the last faculty tea. And his handwriting. It didn’t look like anything produced by a human hand.
“I hope you have some kind of magic decoder ring for this. What the hell is that, by the way? Sanskrit?” At least now she understood why he hadn’t gotten anyone to help him. No point in driving a poor, unsuspecting graduate student over the edge. The curriculum was bad enough.
Koss picked up a stack of papers and began arranging them into a neater pile. “Are you here just to ride my ass, or did you want something in particular?” he snapped.
“Oh, I’m definitely here to ride your ass, but I think I can help. I’m a pretty good typist, and with a little effort I think I can make out those hieroglyphics you call handwriting.”
“Trust me, by the time you finish grad school, your handwriting will look like crap, too. Do you really think you can help? You’ve got your own classes ”
Lola rolled her eyes. “I’m taking one history class and an English class I should’ve taken years ago. I don’t think I’m in any danger of flunking out anytime soon. It’ll be cool. Your work is so interesting. I wish I’d been there when you were off in the field making these discoveries. It sure beats the hell out of reading some play about a guy who never shows up. Sounds too much like Ginger’s love life.”
Koss seemed to ponder the idea for a moment. “I could certainly use the help. Of course I’ll give you collaboration credit…”
“For what? Doing clerical work? Please! Besides, the last thing we want to do is draw attention to us. You could get into all sorts of trouble.” Lola shook her head vigorously.
“I already told you. I don’t give a damn about that. You’re not my student. And you’re unlikely to be my student for at least another year.”
“Actually, Koss, I could finish up in December. That’s why I’m getting these core classes out of the way. I’ve already applied for the grad program.” She shrugged. “I probably won’t get in, but I’ve applied.”
“You’re kidding? Why didn’t you tell me before?”
Lola bit her lip, uncertain herself why she hadn’t shared the news. “I don’t know. I guess I wasn’t sure I would be able to do it. I didn’t want to let you down. ”
“Lola, you’re not going to mess this up.” He pulled her into his arms. “You’re too smart for that.”
The gentle kisses eased all her fears. Too bad he couldn’t be there to kiss her twenty-four hours a day. She reached over to take his notes. Studying his penmanship ruefully, she shook her head in dismay. Apparently even the most brilliant people had to have some flaws.

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