Ladies Night

So the other day I was watching some TV show the name of which I don’t recall, but it was about women in unusual situations. These three women were a Hasidic Jewish rock band (You can see why I was enthralled). Anyway, in keeping with their traditions, they can only perform in front of an all-female audience. They were having a bear of a time booking gigs, and I didn’t get to see all of the show, but it got me to thinking. How cool would it be to actually have events that were only for women?

It seems that everywhere we go as women we are subject to harassment by creepy ass men. When I was younger I was hugely into basketball and loved nothing better than hanging out with my friends at a local sports bar, hoisting a few brews and watching the game. With much trash talking, natch. Well, nine times out of ten we couldn’t get through the game without some guy (or guys) bothering us. No matter how much we ignored them, there they were. Indeed, some of my friends preferred to hang out at gay bars for that very reason. I didn’t like the vibe there because quiet as it’s kept gay men can be just as misogynistic as straight guys. Hell, if I was going to be treated like crap I might as well get a free drink for my trouble.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to rescue a friend from a guy who got too handsy, and I actually had to punch a dude in the face once for grabbing my ass. Seriously? Who needs this kind of grief?

I doubt anyone will be opening a women’s only bar anytime soon. Indeed even lesbian bars are quickly becoming a thing of the past, but I think it would be awesome if Ladies Night could somehow actually be just for women. No worrying about being roofied, or going to the toilet in pairs to avoid harassment. Just a night of great music or sports with some friends.

Interesting Response to Men Aren’t Stupid

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There’s a reader who took umbrage with my book, Men Aren’t Stupid. So much so that she felt the need to review it on two sites as well as on her own blog. No, I’m not linking back, because that would be pointless. She seemed to like much of it but had problems with me saying that men with children are to be avoided, and that men give relationship advice that is slanted to their advantage, not yours. Apparently, she’s concerned about the fairness of not dating men with kids. That if we reject them for having kids how can we say they’re wrong for rejecting us. Uh, do you think they don’t? And do you think your willingness to date them changes that? Look this is dating, not a social program. If you are under the mistaken impression that life is fair, well, I don’t know what to tell you. The majority of men are not interested in dating women with children. Period. Your opening your life and your children’s lives to the drama of dating a man with children notwithstanding. This is not a fairness issue, this is a commonsense issue. Men who are interested in having families don’t run around making babies with women they’re not married to. 

Now on to the other comment, she also stated that I believe that men don’t think about anything but sex. Actually, I didn’t say that. Masters and Johnson said that more than fifty years ago. Having lived with men in one situation or another for much of my life I must say I haven’t seen anything to persuade me that this isn’t true. If you have opposing evidence, please present it. Until then I will continue to believe what my own eyes and experience tell me: Men are focused on sex. If you don’t believe me, ask them.