Supposedly the baby is now the size of an apple. So could someone explain to me why I’m the size of a bus? I hadn’t planned to post this picture, for one thing I need a color touch-up like damn and whoa. Of course, I won’t be coloring until after the baby is born, but all that gray makes me look like my child’s grandmother. I realized that I don’t have any pictures of myself from when I was pregnant with Luke. When I saw this picture I understood why. I don’t get a cute little “baby bump” like normal pregnant women. I get a “baby barrel”– just round all the way around. Not a good look.
Interestingly enough I’ve only gained five pounds. What’s really funny is that I had forgotten that I was down twenty pounds before I got pregnant. It’s only recently been cool enough to wear jeans again, and I remembered that I liked some maternity jeans I’d gotten from the Gap. So I ordered a pair online. I ordered one size larger than my previous size because Gap jeans run a bit small. Got them home and pulled them on, they literally fell off me. Freaked me out for a minute until I remembered I’d lost weight. Well, after the pain of returning them I just got a pair of jeans at Target where I can actually try the damned things on.
Why oh why don’t stores have maternity clothes anymore? It’s so bloody annoying. I know there are places like Motherhood, unfortunately they’re filled with absolutely hideous crap. I’d rather wear sackcloth and ashes. Of course there is A Pea in a Pod where everything costs roughly the equivalent of the GNP of a small Caribbean nation. Someone even suggested Isabelle Oliver. Only if I win the lottery darling.