Those who read this blog regularly know I’ve been looking for a dining room table for ten years. You know what else I’ve been trying to buy for ten years? A goddamned swimsuit. I know. I know. We all have our ills in that department, but your blues aren’t like mine. What I really want is a two-piece, a tankini. At the pool I have to take my little guy to the bathroom with me, and getting naked to pee is less than comfortable when you have a toddler who was breast-fed. Boobs still mean lunch to him. So a tankini would be ideal, but as you’ve often heard me lament, my weight tends to congregate around my middle, thus resulting in muffin top. Ideally I’d like a high waisted bottom on my tankini. Well, I’ve only found one place with them, Land’s End. Right now they’re marked down to $40 from originally $54. I’ll probably get it, though I’m really annoyed, because seriously $54 is what I expect to pay for a WHOLE SWIMSUIT. And people wonder why I hate shopping.